Creating a safe space for our children should be one of the priorities when we are raising our children. They need a sanctuary, a place where they can decompress and enjoy themselves. By doing this, we’ll create an environment in which they can be themselves in and feel free to explore new things.
Before we move on, I think it’s important to understand what a safe space is.
Dictionary.com defines it as “a place that provides a physically and emotionally safe environment for a person or group of people, especially a place where people can freely express themselves without fear of prejudice, negative judgment, etc.”.
It is important for their physical, emotional, and mental health, for our children to feel safe and able to express themselves.
8 things you can do to create a safe space for your kids
1. A Safe Home
It is not a surprise that this is at the top of the list. Who your child is going to grow up to be, the skills that they develop, their self-worth, and personality start at home. It is here where you need to nurture, provide protection, and love them so they can grow up as well-rounded adults.
If you encourage an environment where their accomplishments are celebrated and their pitfalls are worked on together to improve rather than criticize, your children will feel safe at home.
Knowing that failure is to be seen as an opportunity to learn from their mistakes and improve to potentially not make them again, rather than their parents shaming them or making them feel inadequate, will create an environment of trust. This will help them thrive.
2. Good friends
It can be hard, if not impossible, to control who their friends are or who they associate with at school. But you can do your part by advising them when you see that one of their friends might be on the wrong path. We can help them cultivate good friendships by encouraging them to seek good associations.
Friends will play a major role in your child’s emotional and mental health. If they are involved with kids that get in trouble often, your child might fall into the same behavioral patterns as their friends. On the other hand, if they seek good associations with good qualities, your child will have positive influences that will encourage good behaviors.
3. Allow them to actually have a childhood
Sometimes parents are in such a rush for their children to grow up that the child doesn’t really get a chance to be a child. They bombard the child with grown up things, such as:
- Expecting them to act like a grown up
- Giving them grown up responsibilities
- Sexualizing them by the way they dress
- Asking them about boyfriends and girlfriends early on
- Turning them into their bff and sharing their relationship drama
These are just to name a few. Do not force your child to grow up too fast and forfeit their childhood. Now, I understand that sometimes the family situation might leave you with no other choice. Your child might need to contribute and/or step up to more mature responsibilities. However, if possible, this should be avoided.
Kids need to be kids. They need to play outside, get dirty, play with their friends, and be care-free. Childhood goes by in the blink of an eye. They will have a lifetime to be grown-ups and shoulder the burdens of adulthood and all the duties it comes with. For now, let them be kids and do kid things.
4. Food
Food insecurity is very damaging for a child, not only physically, but also mentally.
Feeding America says that “According to the USDA, one in every five children is unsure where they will get their next meal”, and that “more than 13 million children faced hunger in 2022”.
When a child struggles with food insecurity, they struggle in school, develop health problems, and it affects their growth.
When a child doesn’t have to worry about food, they can focus on doing well in school and making friends. This is essential in creating a safe space for your child.
If you are currently struggling to cover groceries, check out the website of Feeding America by clicking here. You can find more information on: Finding a Food pantry near you, SNAP enrollment assistance, Kids’ feeding programs, affordable health care, and more.
5. Clothes
They do not need to be designer brands or the latest trend, your child just needs clothes on their back to cover them. There are a lot of clothes that your child can choose from to show their own style and personality.
Having clothes to put together a few outfits will make them feel more confident and good about themselves. The way one chooses to dress can reflect the way we think, our mood, and personality. Have you ever heard of the saying “dress for success”? The way we dress can have a huge impact on how we feel.
So having a few choices will allow your child to showcase their style, whether it is simple or more accessorized.
6. Spend quality time with your children
Spending quality time with your child and fully engaging with them, will do wonders. Doing this has many benefits:
- Strengthens your bond
- It’s a foundation for a confident child that feels secured at home and with their parents
- Encourages open communication
- Strengthens the child’s self-worth (they internalize their parent’s attention and interest towards them as being worthy of their love. Therefore, creating an assurance that they matter and are important)
- You get to know your child better and the child also gets to learn about their parents
- Builds and strengthen parent-child emotional bonds
When you make an effort to be intentional with the time you spend with your children, not only are you setting them up for success, but you are also creating a safe space for them to grow and thrive. Even if your time is limited, make sure that the time you can spend with them is quality time.
7. Teach them to accept rejection
Even though this can be a sour subject, in order to create a strong safe space, your child needs to understand and accept that not everyone will always like them. They are not always going to get along with everyone they meet, which in turn, also means that the same is true for how others will feel about them.
Children need to learn not to take this personally. There will be times when some people are not going to like them because they do not like their hobby, or even their favorite game. The reason is not always a big thing, and that’s ok.
There’s a saying in Spanish that says that “Nadie es monedita de oro para caerle bien a todo el mundo”. Which roughly translates to “No one is a gold coin that everyone will love”. If your child understands this, their peace won’t be easily disturbed, therefore, always maintaining a safe environment.
8. Love
A child that is loved will always thrive and grow feeling nurtured and protected. Do not skimp in showing your child affection and that you care about them. When children are loved, they grow to be confident, handle adversity better, and are less likely to struggle with trust issues.
There is truly no downside in loving them openly.
To wrap up
Creating a safe space for our children has many benefits. You will have a respectful, confident child that will be ready to face any hurdles that life may throw their way. They will have the assurance that you will always be there for them, and they can always have access to a safe space where they can recharge.
They will know that a safe space doesn’t only have to be limited to home. It can be wherever they are or when you are together.
In order to establish a strong foundation, we need to do our part in building it for them.
Psss… You might be interested in reading 8 Gifts We Can Give Our Children So They Can Grow Into Good Adults.
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