Brat, the one word no parent ever wants to be associated with their child. Parents take pride in their children being well-behaved and well-mannered. Consequently, having their child being referred to as an ill-mannered brat feels the same as a stake to the heart.
Sadly, this is how many children are described nowadays. There is no place where this is more evident than in the classrooms. The New York Post says that “Teachers are constantly getting verbal threats from students” simply for asking students to follow basic school rules.
Just a quick search will result in countless stories from teachers that are overwhelmed with their students’ behavior in the classroom.
The overall feeling of disrespect in their profession has caused a lot of teachers to want to leave their positions as educators. Education Week says that “35 percent of teachers say they’re likely to quit and find another job outside of teaching within the next two years”
What is happening?
It seems that nowadays children have gained a power that we did not have in previous generations. This is not necessarily a bad thing. I think it’s great that children are more likely to speak up when something seems unfair or when someone is in need of help.
But along with the good, has come the bad. Some kids seem to lack respect for authority figures. This is extremely apparent in the way that they interact with their teachers. They do not want to listen to their teachers or follow the classroom’s rules. They talk back disrespectfully and even make threats to the adults in charge.
How did this happen?
I honestly am not sure but have an idea of what could have happened. I think for a lot of people of my generation (I’m a millennial, and yes, I know what you’re thinking, but hear me out), it has been about giving our children a voice. While at the same time, allowing them to feel heard and seen.
We grew up in a time when children’s opinions were not really taken into account. Many kids also suffered through unfair treatment in school. Sometimes, they might’ve even had a mean teacher that made things hard for them. When they complained to their parents, they were probably not believed, or even got punished for not listening to their teacher.
These types of situations gave people (who are now parents) a different perspective. Many have promised themselves that their child will never have to endure what they did. As a result, letting their child know that they do not need to do anything that they don’t want to do.
But this has turned out to be a double-edged sword. It seems that, accidentally, in the pursuit of protecting the children and making sure that they are never pushed aside, little brat monsters have been created.
How can we make sure our kids don’t turn into brats at school
1. Teach them respect
Teach your kids to be respectful to the adults around them. Kids need to know that they have to follow rules and must show respect to the adults in charge. Being respectful doesn’t equal being oppressed or that they have to accept mistreatment. It means behaving in an appropriate manner and being orderly.
The truth is that they will most likely not encounter a teacher abusing their power or trying to harm them. Therefore, the only risk they are taking is of actually learning something and not getting in trouble since they are behaving appropriately.
2. Teach them that their teachers are not the enemy
I can see how in the eyes of children some teachers are boring and no fun. They probably think that they are the rain in their parade.
This is probably because teachers represent rules, order, and homework (which has never been fun). The class has to settle down when they are around, and kids can’t play on their phones or do whatever they feel like doing. However, this doesn’t mean that the teachers are the enemy.
Teachers really do care about the well-being of their students. They spend most of their day with the students trying to teach them important things that they will need all throughout their lives. And guess what, when they go home, they continue working for their students by grading homework, tests, and the essays that their students have written.
Teachers are also the first line of defense for their students. In case of an emergency, it’s the teachers that are there first to protect them.
Children have to respect, but also be appreciative of their teachers.
3. Teach them boundaries
Kids need to know that some boundaries should NEVER be crossed. Just because they are upset that their phone got taken away, or that the teacher took away some points from their grade, doesn’t mean they can threaten, hit, or yell obscenities at their teachers.
If they misbehave, there will be consequences. And when faced with the consequences of their actions, they can’t lash out and get violent with the adults in charge (whether that is verbally or physically).
4. You need to respect their teacher as well
Yeap, you do! Your kids will follow your lead. If you are not showing respect to their teacher and making your child feel empowered over them, guess what’s going to happen?
Your kid will have zero respect for them.
You need to set the example. Let your child know that while they are in school, their teacher is in charge. If they misbehave, you will hear about it, and they will be in trouble.
Listen, we are not living in our parents’ generation or further back, teachers will not slap your child in the back of the head or slap their hands with a ruler. Those days are far gone. No teacher will ever put their hands on your child. Their job is to educate their students and enforce appropriate repercussions for their bad behavior (such as detention or suspension, just to name a few).
Teachers are your ally, not your enemy.
To sum up
If we were to encourage our children to have an entitled behavior, we would only be doing them a disservice. School prepares our kids for the real world where there are rules and laws that have to be followed. Whether we agree with everything or not, the truth is that we must abide by them, otherwise, we would have to face serious repercussions.
Moreover, even though our kids have rights and should have a strong sense of self, we should remember that they are still children. They are in their formative years and still learning about the ways of the world. We should be encouraging them to be polite, respectful, and kind. Not to be spoiled, bratty children that believe they can rule everywhere they go.
This kind of attitude will isolate them from their peers as well as make it hard for them to learn in school. It is our responsibility as parents to ensure that they become virtuous individuals when they grow up. Setting boundaries and having order won’t hurt them. On the contrary, it will help them build good character traits and set them on the right path of becoming well-rounded adults.
Psss… It is impossible to do everything right while raising our children. However, there are some things we must make sure not to miss. You might be interested in reading Good Parents Avoid Making These 10 Mistakes.
