When our children begin to go through puberty, we have no other choice but to accept that they are no longer our little babies. They are growing up, maturing, and becoming men and women.
We all learn with our parents and at school that puberty is the transition from childhood to adulthood. It usually takes place at around the ages of 8- 13 for girls, and 9-14 for boys. We learn that it’s a time when our bodies begin to reach sexual maturity.
For both boys and girls, their bodies begin to change. They start to grow hair, start to develop acne, get taller, and many more physical changes take place.
However, there are other changes that take place when your preteen begins to enter puberty. Some of these are the result of their changing hormones that make them act completely different from the child that you have always known.
But fret not, as these are all normal changes. Still, it is important to know what these changes are so when we spot them, we can understand what is happening to our growing kids.
9 Signs your preteen is entering puberty
1. Start to get annoyed about everything
Everything you say, what your spouse says, what their siblings say, is always annoying. Even questions about their day may start sending them over the edge.
Make peace with the fact, that for a while, everything everyone does will be at risk of being annoying.
Heck, they might get annoyed with themselves at times because they can’t explain something right or because they made a mistake.
Just remind yourself that it’s not personal, is just puberty.
2. May begin bickering more with siblings
It will suddenly feel like they are always in some sort of argument with their siblings. Things can take a turn at the drop of a hat.
If you have a preteen, then you know what I’m talking about. They will bicker with their sibling over how they are chewing, who is sitting in which seat, who looked at the other in the wrong way, who said something annoying and now they can’t even look at them, and the list goes on.
It is never ending.
3. Eye rolls for days
Make no mistake, this is not exclusive to girls. Society has made us believe only girls give side eyes. Let me tell you, boys do too.
Your children will bestow you with endless eye rolls, side eyes, and anything else in between. Accompanied by all the attitude they can gather to give you.
Just hang in there and stand your ground. This will pass…slowly… hopefully…but it’ll pass.
4. Sassy back talk
Oh yes, they will always have something to say and not in the nicest way. They are entering the stage of believing they always know better and you are just old. You can’t possibly understand how things are done nowadays.
Get ready for this, because this stage will last a good while. Generally, this is almost a rite of passage that every preteen and teenager need to go through. They will always know better, understand how everything works, and think that you are some sort of prehistoric creature that has no idea how society functions in the modern age.
So, strap up for the fun ride.
Related: Why It’s a Great Thing That Your Child Wants to Talk Back to You.
5. Become meaner
They do!!! Preteens are wild, they get so mean at times. They may start calling their siblings names and use very harsh words towards everyone.
This most likely happens because of the rush of hormones surging through their bodies, but they become little ogres.
Even though this is part of growing up, you should still correct them if they cross a line. Just be prepared to call their attention to this many, many, many times.
6. The endless void of digestion opens
Was your child a picky eater? Well, they might not be one anymore. Your child will begin to get hungry ALL THE TIME and eat everything in sight.
Be prepared for your grocery shopping to grow, as well as your bill. The sight of your child looking inside the fridge or the pantry will become regular sightings.
7. Get ready for the smell
Every puberty article will talk about body odor but nothing compares to experiencing it. It will take you by surprise when you first smell the little funk on your previously odorless child.
It gets worse once puberty has set in, but make no mistake, those first preteen stenches will have you running to the grocery store for some deodorant and air freshener.
The smell is particularly stronger in boys. So, if you have sons, get ready, because it’s going to be a doozy.
8. Laundry grows
And you thought things were going to get better once you didn’t have to wash and fold those teeny-tiny baby clothes.
You will be surprised at the amount of clothes your preteen goes through. I don’t even know how it happens but it just grows!
Weird smells just cling to their fabrics and it seems as if they go around picking up as much dirt as they can into their clothes. It is even worse if they are into sports.
Just know that their hampers will be full by the end of every week.
9. You’ll feel it in your wallet
And not only at the grocery store!
Your preteen will begin to go through many growth spurts. You will have to constantly get them a new wardrobe. Not to mention that it’s usually at this stage when they truly begin to develop their own sense of style (if they haven’t already). Preteens become very aware of brands and what’s trending at the time.
If you have an active child, you know how often they come home with ripped clothes. They somehow manage to rip their pants, shirts, sweaters, and any other piece of clothing. This includes their shoes as well. It’s almost like they put them in a shredder and bring them back home destroyed.
You will experience your preteen’s growth in your wallet too.
5 Parenting Tips to get through your child’s puberty
1. Don’t take it personal
Listen, your child loves you. Underneath their attitudes, eye rolls, and all of their “I’m ok” when something is clearly wrong, they love you.
Puberty stinks. It’s a very confusing time for children to transition to. However, never underestimate the difference your love, support, and patience make. So, just hang in there and don’t take it personal.
2. Take time for yourself
Go out on your own or with friends. Do something that you enjoy and that’s only for yourself. If you go out to eat, enjoy your meal and don’t bring anything to anyone at home. It may sound harsh, but these outings are just for you.
Do something that brings you joy and that you truly enjoy. Maybe pick up a new hobby or restart an old one. This will help you clear and refresh your mind to continue being the best parent you can be.
Related: How To Practice Self-Care and Mindfulness as a Mom.
3. Organize dates
It may sound funny, but organize dates with your child. Go out to the movies, eat ice cream, or go on a walk together. Do your best to spend time with your child, in which they get your undivided attention. Ask them about how things are going in school and with their friends. Give them the chance to talk and make sure this time is all about them.
By doing this you will draw closer to your child and you’ll learn a lot about your changing preteen soon to be teenager.
4. Choose your battles
There will be days when you will not understand your child. They will test your limits and make you want to completely lose your cool. You might get so frustrated that the only thing you would want to do is scream and punish them for the rest of their lives.
Some days you might lose your cool (after all, you’re only human) and that’s ok. However, resist the urge to bring down the hammer at everything they do. Evaluate if it’s serious enough to be addressed, or if it’s better to let it go.
Not all battles are worth fighting.
5. Reach out to a trusted person
Whether it is a family member, friend, or a therapist, reach out to someone that you can trust. It is important to have an outlet to vent (if you need to) and get ideas and/or advice in how to handle an issue that you may be currently facing.
It is very comforting to receive support and also learn that you are not the only one going through the preteen and teen woes.
To wrap up
This stage in their lives is packed with changes. They will be discovering new things about themselves and developing new interests. Your child’s personality may begin to change, which might catch you by surprise to see that they are no longer little kids. You are actively witnessing the adult in them beginning to form.
The preteen stage and puberty can be very challenging times for both children and parents. Always keep the lines of communication open between you and your child, while at the same time arming yourself with a lot of patience. This stage in their lives can be very hard to manage. Your kids’ emotions will sometimes be all over the place, and it’s up to you to help your child redirect those feelings to a positive direction.
Even though the eye rolls, sassy remarks, and attitudes will sometime send you over for a loop, just remind yourself that this stage will pass. At the end of this journey, you will have a grown up in your hands…and a few more grey hairs.
