Having rules for your children is one of the greatest things you can do for them. They may not always love the rules that are put in place, but in time, they’ll come to understand, and even appreciate, the very rules they once were so against.
You see, having rules for your kids serves many purposes, from keeping them safe to teaching good character traits. It is our job as parents to raise our children into decent and productive human beings. In order to do this, we need to make sure they are walking down the right path.
In this post, we’ll go over 6 benefits that rules have on children. We will discover what the key to successfully implementing rules is and how to have our children willingly follow.
6 Benefits that rules have on kids
1. Clear expectations
Your child doesn’t need to play the guessing game and try to find out what it is you expect from them. The rules are clearly stated. From the curfew they must adhere to, to not playing ball inside the house.
This will help the family function smoothly. Now, that doesn’t mean that sometimes rules won’t be broken, but that’s part of the course when raising children. Just make sure that they know and understand the consequences that will follow their actions. They might not be happy with the results of their bad behavior, but it will serve as a lesson on how actions have consequences.
2. Teaches responsibility
By having clear rules, your child knows what it is that they are responsible for and what tasks need to be completed. This helps your child follow directions and have a well-defined structure. They learn to be responsible and independent. Children will learn that they need to complete their assignments and how to do it well. Therefore, allowing them to take pride in a job well done.
3. Children learn accountability
There is no one else to pass the responsibility onto. They are the ones that are in charge. This means that whether things turn out well or not, they are responsible for the outcome. Kids learn to take accountability for their actions and results.
They will quickly grasp the idea that good actions are rewarded, while bad actions have consequences.
4. Most likely to cooperate
Children are more likely to cooperate and follow rules when they know what it is expected of them. Do not withhold the reasons why these rules have been set in place. Kids respond so much better when they understand the reasons behind the household rules.
As a matter of fact, many times your child may not even agree with the rules, but because you took the time to talk to them and explain your reasons, they will be more inclined to follow them. So, make sure you are keeping those communication lines open, be willing to hear your children out, and answer any questions they may have.
5. Kids feel heard and seen
Especially when you are willing to talk to them, and at times, compromise when possible. Remember, even though they are children and have to follow your rules, they are still people. You will not lose your authority if you show them respect and take into account their opinions.
Once your child understands that the rules are there because you love them and are looking out for them, they will feel cared for.
You see, children desperately need your guidance. They do not know what they are doing or how things should be handled in the real world. Kids will sometime give some pushback, but this is part of growing up. Mostly, children feel more secured when they have a clear path to follow.
And never forget this: A child who is not allowed to ask questions and is constantly met with “because I said so”, will only create a sneaky child.
6. Self-sufficiency
You probably didn’t expect to see this one on the list. But as it turns out, this is a welcomed consequence of having rules.
Through rules, kids learn the appropriate way to behave in various situations, how to complete tasks independently, manage their time, follow instruction, and so much more.
These rules will become the template that they follow for themselves as they continue to grow up and become adults. There will be some tweaking of the rules to match their own views as they become adults, but this will be the foundation to becoming their own mature person.
The key to success
The key to having success implementing rules with your kids is to have open communication with them, continue to work on developing strong bonds as a family, and to stay consistent. Do your best to create an environment where that closeness can be achieved and maintained.
However, do not make it your goal to become your child’s best friend and become the “cool parent”. Your child may lose respect for you and begin to see you as another friend, not an authoritative figure. Remember, they will have a lot of friends but just one set of parents.
At the same time, don’t lean too strongly on the other side of the pendulum by always “putting your foot down” and being unmovable. This can also create a plethora of problems where your child might begin to do things secretly and head into a dangerous path.
Just have a balance. There will be times when you might agree in adjusting a rule and come to a middle ground. But there will be other times when you won’t be able to do so. It is your job to give them the instruction they need and help guide them as they are growing up.
In conclusion
Maintaining rules and getting your child to cooperate can be challenging and energy draining at times. I mean, the number of times you will have to remind your child of the rules and their responsibilities would be too many to count.
There will be times when your child will ask a million questions as to why a rule is in place or why you can’t change it. This can be incredibly irritating and difficult to manage. But when this happens, take a deep breath and do your best to explain why this is the best decision for their well-being. After giving a reasonable explanation, if you still get pushback, just end the conversation.
At the end of the day, parenting is not a total democracy. You are the adult in charge and you do not need to bargain or need your child’s approval for every single household rule.
Ultimately, you just need to have a balance. Soon you’ll see your children grow into well-rounded adults who would have benefitted from having structure and rules.
Psss… You might be interested in reading What Children Really Need From Their Parents To Be Happy.
